Saturday, July 15, 2006

Disregardable Drabble...

Thesis: People live too much, and think too little.

Anithesis: People think too much, and live too little.

Too many people live their lives unabashedly content to be blissfully ignorant of the world and people around them, and others are too busy fussing and worrying about what the outcomes of each course of action they could take that they forget to live.

There are 'thinkers' and there are 'doers.'I have a few friends that I have labelled, 'uber-doers.' They don't think...period. They just do... Let's take my buddy Braden E. He's a great example of this. a moron, plain and simple. He doesn't use his brain at all...ever. However, he always has a new and interesting story to tell about what kind of trouble he had to get himself out of, and the hot chicks he's met along the way (hahaha love you, buddy). He's a shoot first ask why later sort of a guy. The personification of the word, 'doer.'

I, unlike Braden, am completely guilty of being a 'thinker'. I'll be the first to admit that I am a worrier...and a perfectionist. When I really dedicate myself to something I want it to be perfect. However I can never acheive the level of perfection that I want because I always worry that I'm never good enough at it to make it perfect... so I end up stuck on the edge of my metaphorical chair because I'm too fucking scared to try getting up.

This is what my inner monologue sounds like:

"I never practice enough to be great. I may be smart, but I'm not hard working enough to get it done or even get it right. No matter how good I am, or how good I think I am at something there is always someone out there who will be better at it than me.

That last sentence is true. Everyone knows it's true...I know it's true. But it aggravates me to no end...because I'm selfish. I want to be perfect. I want to be the best at whatever it is I do. I want that. (hahaha "I want, I want, I want! Me! Me! Me! I! I! I!!") but I can't because it's impossible to be the best.

But is it? Is it really impossible to be the best at something? Without being arrogant? Because, while, yes, I am arrogant...and stubborn...and prideful, I hate people who are. Does that mean I'm humble? I can't be humble if I know I'm arrogant. I hate myself...But I don't."

While all that shit is milling around in my mind...nothing gets done. Because I used up all of my time wondering if I'll ever be great without being arrogant. Instead of using that time to practice fencing, get a job, or...participating in activities that will help my mind grow or whatever.

So, for people like me; Where is the happy medium between Thought and Action?


lx said...

Perhaps ... thought --> consideration --> action!

Good to see the pix of the snowman during this summer, Jessie ;-)

By the way, I've a friend who's heading to Logan, Utah with his family.

worry wort said...


This post is fascinating to me because I pretty much feel the same EXACT way about myself. I never get anything done because all I ever think about is how whatever it is I finally do will not measure up to my own expectations, and there will always be someone out there that will be more successful than I. I myself know that I am being stupid, mostly because I do actually believe that we all have our own unique perspective on the world, and that no one can ever do anything the same way that I do it, even if I don't have complete confidence in myself. I would like to think of myself as an "artist" but I've never really created anything particularly amazing or substantial, mostly because my motivation is crippled by this non-stop cycle of thinking. Anyway, I don't really have a point, just that I share in your frustration. In the end, I think it comes down to just doing it, kinda like Nike. Unfortunately though, I wear New Balance.


thesexyswede said...

HAHAHAHA....that's awesome Adam. It's good to know that there is someone else out there who at least understands how I feel. thank you.

Thanks for the Advice Alex.:D you're awesome.