Thursday, April 26, 2007


I'm so physically exhausted right now.

My legs kill.

My left arm hurts.

my feet are sore.

My brain feels like mush too.

... but I'm happy.

Thursday, April 19, 2007


You got sent to the other side of the nation to sort your life out.

But, all you've done is successfully fucked it up more.

Stop drinking.

Stop doing drugs. you're never going to be able to pas drug history if you want to go into the marines

I miss you, you're better than this.
You're smart, you're better than this.

But, whatever.

It's not my life you're screwing up, but I swear to God if you get Lisa hurt in anyway I will make you pay.

Thursday, April 12, 2007

Dear God, give me the strength...

I've broken down about three times just this past week.

I'm so lost right now. I'm... very confused about most things, but at the same time very sure of a few.

The Few and Inseparable Many:
- I don't miss anybody from last year, except for maybe Sousa and Cameron Bench, even then man... not as much as I would have thought.
- I'm the world's worst friend.
- I suck as a leader.
- Congratulations Chase, you got what you wanted: I'm failing as President.
- Nothing makes me as happy as I was when fencing was the most important thing in my life.
- Andrew Cerv, Lisa Aston, Michelle Dowdle, Brett Merkeley, Scott Robinson. I'm effing lucky to have you, but there is no chance in hell that I deserve your friendship (especially Brett's after all the shit I've put him through)
- I cheated. cheated cheated cheated. On an amazing guy with someone who made me miserable what the fuck was I thinking?
- I'm a procrastinator and a fake.
- I don't care anymore, I've forgotten what caring for something feels like.
- It's hard to laugh.
- I don't know who I am any more. I'm too much of a social cameleon.
- Nathan, my little brother. I miss him so much.

I'm so emotionally stressed.

1. Get My Shit Together

Thursday, April 05, 2007


I realised something.
it's a secret

Sunday, April 01, 2007